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Author: Subject: 4000BHP GOLF BY 2010
James

posted on 1/7/03 at 04:58 PM Reply With Quote
4000BHP GOLF BY 2010

4000BHP GOLF BY 2010' SAYS MAN
The Volkswagen Golf will have over 4000bhp by 2010, according to
calculations carried out by an automotive maths expert. Professor Ken
Freeply of Nigel Havers College, Kettering claims to have reached this
stunning conclusion after studying the increasing power outputs of
successive Golf models launched since the original GTi model of 1976. 'If we
look at the way the output of the most powerful Golf increases over time it
is possible to extrapolate future power ratings for the future,' Prof
Freeply explained. 'Please stop sniggering. Extrapolate isn't a rude word,'
he added, narkily.
'So, where the original Golf GTi had just 110bhp,' the unamused brainiac
continued after Sniff Petrol had apologised for laughing at him, 'The MkII
GTi 16 valve offered 139bhp which is 126% of that original output. Then the
MkIII VR6 put out 174bhp, 158% more, and a percentage point increase of 32.
But when we get to the new MkIV R32 we find 240bhp, meaning a 218% increase,
which is 60 percentage points more than the previous power peak increase.
Thus we see that the percentage point increase pretty much doubles with
successive generations which means we can look forward to a 120% increase
for the MkV Golf, from which I have calculated 338% of 240bhp, or a stunning
811bhp. But, the real shock comes with the MkVI model which will enjoy a
240% increase, or 578% in total, and that means a staggering power output of
4688bhp for the top of the range variant.'
Professor Freeply later denied that his maths was 'rubbish'.

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highspeeddirt

posted on 1/7/03 at 06:02 PM Reply With Quote
When testing the R32 on one of the motoring programes they said that the 240bhp was double that of a 1.8 GTi but that it also weighed twice as much, so if the Proffessor is right the Golf is going to be about the size of a Kenilworth truck
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Peteff

posted on 1/7/03 at 08:16 PM Reply With Quote
It will also run on hydrogen which it extracts from the atmosphere as it goes and the only by product will be water so it will be able to recycle its own exhaust emissions. The bodywork will be so pedestrian friendly you will be able to bounce babies off the bonnet and the elasticated windscreen will repel rain and insects. It will have a natural pigmentation developed from fireflies to do away with the need for hazard lights and the tyres will have regenerative capacity and octopus like grip. It will also be obsolete because we will all be travelling by matter transporter, don't you watch Star Trek?.

yours, Pete.





yours, Pete

I went into the RSPCA office the other day. It was so small you could hardly swing a cat in there.

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Simon

posted on 10/7/03 at 11:17 AM Reply With Quote
Unfortunatey HSD beat me to it.

The last time I heard (3-5 yrs) the Golf had put on over 800 lbs (over the orig), so I reckon HSD, it may be weighing more like the QE2

ATB

Simon

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timf

posted on 10/7/03 at 11:58 AM Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by highspeeddirt
the Golf is going to be about the size of a Kenilworth truck


having driven the truck without a trailer beleve me when i say they can leave 4 rubber stips on the road for 500 + yards from wheel spin the golf wont compete

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PeetBee

posted on 10/7/03 at 02:36 PM Reply With Quote
for more of these style chekc out the website
www.sniffpetrol.com

The archive section will keep you busy for a while!!

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David Jenkins

posted on 10/7/03 at 02:45 PM Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by timf

having driven the truck without a trailer beleve me when i say they can leave 4 rubber stips on the road for 500 + yards from wheel spin the golf wont compete


One of the first things I taught my wife when she was learning to drive was "Don't treat an unattached artic tractor like a normal HGV - they're 10-ton racing cars!"



David






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stephen_gusterson

posted on 10/7/03 at 02:57 PM Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Simon
Unfortunatey HSD beat me to it.

The last time I heard (3-5 yrs) the Golf had put on over 800 lbs (over the orig), so I reckon HSD, it may be weighing more like the QE2

ATB

Simon




The new polo weighs in at an unbelievable 1170 kilos or so.

Engines start at 55hp!

atb

steve






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mandeep_sr

posted on 14/7/03 at 01:03 AM Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by James
Professor Freeply later denied that his maths was 'rubbish'.


If his maths not then his research is.

VW made a mk2 golf called the golf limited aided by vw motorsport they took a 1.8 16v engine and put a supercharger from the g60 onto it. This pushes out 210 bhp. This golf is very rare and still fetch around 10k when up for sale. IIRC they only produced 50.

1983 mk1 1.8 gti - 110bhp
1990 mk2 golf limited (16v g60) - 210 bhp
1995 mk3 golf vr6 highline - 185bhp
2003 mk4 r32 - 240bhp

So finally after 13 years we see a 30 bhp difference and an eating dis-order.

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Noodle

posted on 14/7/03 at 06:42 PM Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Peteff
It will also run on hydrogen which it extracts from the atmosphere as it goes and the only by product will be water so it will be able to recycle its own exhaust emissions. The bodywork will be so pedestrian friendly you will be able to bounce babies off the bonnet and the elasticated windscreen will repel rain and insects. It will have a natural pigmentation developed from fireflies to do away with the need for hazard lights and the tyres will have regenerative capacity and octopus like grip.


Yeah, we'll all be wearing foil clothes and our food will be in pill form too.

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