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The Nanny Car
Theshed - 27/3/19 at 10:25 AM

So I am in bed and listening to the news that from 2022 all new cars will have speed limiters and a breathalyser.....this is not a rant about that (I have mixed feelings) but....the little devil in my head started designing the ultimate anti-social car. I was wondering whether there is anything to be added to the usual list...


a) Obviously a 7+ Litre diesel engine with worn out rings from new and twin stack exhausts at pram level (goes without saying)

b) A few traditional features - the 007 Ejector seat/machine guns and rotating number plates are a given.

c) for the retro look I thought a scythe or two at least on the front wheels.

d) Clearly a music system capable of setting off any burglar alarm within 2 miles.

e) As standard the array of air horns playing La cucaracha (for getting the attention of potential sexual partners (note the care I take not to be sexist!))

f) I had thought an ashtray on the outside of each window might be useful.

g) For a streamlined look the mirrors can go (what purpose could they possibly serve when this will be the fastest car on the road)

h) A built in wine fridge might be useful - what about a propshaft powered cork screw?

Now who can do photoshop and who wants to make a pitch to Ford?


joneh - 27/3/19 at 11:03 AM

I wonder how that will effect newly registered kit cars....?


theduck - 27/3/19 at 11:29 AM

It is an EU law, so cars built and registered for use here wont have to comply.


Benzine - 27/3/19 at 11:36 AM

Agree with the diesel but make it a 2 stroke with straight through exhaust (detroit diesel perhaps)

Air starter and straight cut gears for extra noise. Or use a bike engine as the starter


Charlie C - 27/3/19 at 11:45 AM

Too late JLR have beaten you to it and called it the Range Rover sport


jps - 27/3/19 at 12:29 PM

quote:
Originally posted by theduck
It is an EU law, so cars built and registered for use here wont have to comply.


According to the BBC news story on it (https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-47715415) "The Department for Transport said the system would also apply in the UK, despite Brexit"


Mr Whippy - 27/3/19 at 12:58 PM

off course it would

The government can then charge even more for road tax for maintaining the GRP system to govern the cars, while funding other things such as their expenses

Sadly the way things are going a car will be a box with four seats and a screen for streaming films while it quietly whisks you off without you doing anything...

"old" cars will be those weird things that are seen on private tracks using petrol at £50 a litre and at shows, alongside traction engines and carriages.

Kids will be like "What you had to steer that thing! Why is it so noisy? what's that awful smell?! it's rubbish..." Like trying to explain to kids what so great about steam trains.

I for one would certainly not be investing in exotic cars...


russbost - 27/3/19 at 01:10 PM

"I for one would certainly not be investing in exotic cars..." - surely this new law would make anything pre 2022 without the limiter worth far more? Maybe I need to start buying low mileage tidy cars now & storing them!


rf900rush - 27/3/19 at 01:24 PM

I see they have compromised the limiter to a warning.

I remember when mopeds became restricted and devastated the sale of all new mopeds

What would a forced speed limit on new cars do to the car industry.

Only the muppets running the world would buy a new car


Mr Whippy - 27/3/19 at 01:27 PM

so lets see...

Assuming investing in a exotic car is more than 3 years... say 15 - 20 years for some reasonable return so what would be the situation then -

1) Most cars will at that time be electric so the price of petrol will sky rocket due to lower demand pushing up production costs. It will be hard to get hold of and will garages even be able to test emissions? Even now the 10 mpg of Ferrari's etc is a kick in the pants, imagine if that cost £30 or more a gallon! (what my model plane fuel costs).

2) Most cars will be autonomous so manually controlled cars will be limited to less and less roads if allowed at all on public roads.

3) 95% maybe even 99% of people are not driving enthusiasts and tbh could not give a damn if the car was driving itself or not.

Sounds unlikely but the switch from city's full of horses & carriages to cars and trucks took just one decade, when conditions are right things change quickly

Investing in cars might be no better than investing in VHS players



[Edited on 27/3/19 by Mr Whippy]


Angel Acevedo - 27/3/19 at 01:41 PM

Ha...
This thread brings me to the chain of thought that brought me to Locostbuilders and ultimately deciding to attempt to build a Seven Lookalike...
I liked Rush A LOT, so reading about "Red Barchetta" I stumbled upon the short story "a nice morning drive" https://www.mgexp.com/article/nice-drive.html
Then I don“t know how I got here..


SJ - 27/3/19 at 02:13 PM

quote:

I remember when mopeds became restricted and devastated the sale of all new mopeds



I remember when kids de-restricted them!


peter030371 - 27/3/19 at 03:06 PM

GPS based and speed sign reading system (working together) to advise you of the speed limit are already a feature of the Discovery Sport (and I suspect other JLR cars), so why all the fuss? I use the speed limiter on my Disco Sport all the time. I am slightly annoyed that I have to set the limit manually when my car has the hardware to suggest the legal speed for me (which I can override) but not the £xxx option ticked when they built the car (now standard on the build level I have but not at the time).

According to the local JLR main stealer its not an option they can 'install' and is only factory fit even though its just a software option on my car! When the car is out of warranty I will be searching for the software hack to turn it on


coyoteboy - 27/3/19 at 03:41 PM

I think the fuss is in the lesser touted bit, the legally required black box recording your driving habits.


Ivan - 28/3/19 at 10:08 AM

I must admit that if I had to commute daily to and from work in Cape Town I would definitely buy a self drive car and even an electric one if it had the range and was affordable (It's a 90 minute commute each way). My Cobra would then be my fun weekend car.


jps - 28/3/19 at 10:15 AM

quote:
Originally posted by SJ
quote:

I remember when mopeds became restricted and devastated the sale of all new mopeds



I remember when kids de-restricted them!


They still do!


SJ - 28/3/19 at 02:46 PM

quote:

quote:
Originally posted by SJ
quote:

I remember when mopeds became restricted and devastated the sale of all new mopeds


I remember when kids de-restricted them!


They still do!



Indeed - I see several 50cc 2 strokes haring about. Still love the smell and noise!


jps - 28/3/19 at 03:42 PM

quote:
Originally posted by Angel Acevedo
I stumbled upon the short story "a nice morning drive" https://www.mgexp.com/article/nice-drive.html


A good read!