Try reading this out loud but not when the kids or the wife is about !!!!



Once upon a time there lived a beautiful young girl called Rindercella.

Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion.

Rindercella worked very hard frubbing scloors, emptying poss pits and shivelling shot. At the end of the day she was knucking fackered.

The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, and the other was called Betty Swallocks. They were real forrible huckers. They had featy sweet and featy swannies.

The sugly isters had tockets to go to the ball, but the cotton runts wouldn't let Rindercella go.

Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her Gairy Fodmother appeared.

Her name was Cupid Stunt and she was a light rucking fesbian with a twig bat.

She turned a pumpkin and mix sice into a hucking cuge farriage, and six dandy ronkeys with buge hillocks and dig bicks.

The Gairy Fodmother told Rindercella to be back by midnight or there would be a cucking falamity.

At the ball Rindercella was dancing with the Pransome Hince, when suddenly the clock struck twelve.

"Mist all Chrucking Fighty!", said Rindercella and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks and dropping her slass glipper.

The next day the Pransome Hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the sugly isters let him in.

Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifeted her leg and let out a fig bart.

"Pray, who has just farted?", asked the Pransome Hince.

"Blame the fugly hucker over there", said Mary Hinge.

When the stinking brown cloud had lifted he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters without success and their feet stucking funk!

Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted, and gave the pransome hince a knick in the kackers. This was not difficult because he had a dig bick and barge lollocks.

He tried the glass slipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly.

Rindercella and the Pransome Hince were married.

The Pransome Hince lived his life in lucking fuxury and Rindercella lived hers with a follen swanny and they both lived happily ever after.

Ronnie Barker at his very best !