Right i know this is an odd question to ask on a car forum but i know there is alot of people from all kinds of trades that could help.

After 6 years of owning my bungalow i have come to the conclusion that i cant make it a family home. I have tried extensions to the building, conservatory, garage, new bathroom, new kitchen etc trying to make it as homely place to live but its just not working. Dont get me wrong it looks like a show home when its clean but its just not right.
So i have decided to think about buying a new house to try again. I have waisted far too much money on the bungalow now and cant afford to make the wrong choices.

What am i doing wrong?

Is it the colours or fixtures and fittings that make a home?

What makes a family home homely?

I need pro help with this so is there anyone that could give me advise on making a home feel like a family home?

Ideas of colours fixtures and fittings would also help too.


Im just about lost now and just want to make it right for my family.


Thanks very much for your time guys and girls.


Matt and family

Childrens laughter makes a house a home in my opinion.

letting it get messy!

and pets.

[Edited on 26/2/10 by 55ant]

Show homes are neat and tidy.

A 'home' is lived in and although you might keep it tidy, things are where they are and if something is not in its normal place, it does not matter.

for me it was letting the g/f 'assist' in decorating / buying stuff. House has gone from being the 'house i've had for umpteen years' to being a 'home'. Looks great and I feel a little proud to be there. One change was making sure i fixed the draughts to make it snuggly.

Kids, dogs and a bit of damage all add to the feel.

If its to sterile ie constantly tidied then people visitors etc will not feel at ease relaxing.

You cant make a home you have to let it happen

Do you have any good friends who who live in a house that feels 'homely'?

Take a good look around and see what they've done - maybe they have picked nice colours, chosen the right furniture or, as hinted above, they allow a bit of untidiness to make it feel 'lived in'.

If you can't spot it, ask them to come to your house (give them dinner or something) and ask for their opinion.

Finally - some houses just don't work for some people. I lived in one house that was just somewhere to live... I had no feeling for it at all. When I moved elsewhere things were nicer - so maybe, if all else fails, another house would be better. But that should be the last resort...

Lighting and warmth are a good start.

Too bright and a room looks like a hospital, but you don't want it too dark either. Couple of lamps can make all the difference rather than using the main light.

As said a cold/drafty house isn't a good home either.

I think the best way to start is to go through books/magazines and find some pictures that you think are what you are looking for, then use those as inspiration for colours/furnishings. Part of being a home is for you to enjoy being there so it has to be your style.

Probably barking up the wrong tree but bungalow stands out to me! having always lived in a house it just seems right to go up to bed take the kids up to bed,
Personally i couldn't imagine living in a bungalow till the kids have all left home and i cant make it up the stairs anymore Before Alan comments not many years away

i know exactly what you mean, i have been in my house for 8 years and after changing every room in the house and keeping it immaculately decorated, it has never felt homely. People always say how nice the house is and how much room and light it is but its never felt homely to me. I have done the rear garden which i always feel comfortable in and is great for entertaining, but couldnt do the same inside.

We put ours on the market again and decided we would definitely move this time, it sold to the 2nd viewer for not far off the asking price so i guess other people like it, only problem is in 5 years of looking we have only seen one house we like and the bloke wont accept our offer!

I often thought about getting pro help and looking at books but it didnt help.

I like the idea above of looking at homes that you feel comfortable in and seeing if you can make some of the ideas work in your place.

Pics were taken when it was done a few years ago, plants a bit more established now.

I have a bungalow too and can't make it feel right. Its far from being immaculate. I've got the lived in feel and I've got lamps in for a lighted effect but its never felt right.
I too feel that some kind of womans touch might help as I'm rubbish at colour co ordinating and choosing stuff.

I think its a Bungalow thing as i feel the same. We blitzed the place a few years back when we moved in altering rooms etc. there's a 35sqm conservatory on the back and i hate it we knocked down the wall between the living room and kitchen to create an open plan area i hate it, the only room i like is the bathroom cos its always warm and it has my power shower.

Having lived in various flats, a terraced house, a six bedroomed town house and now a bungalow, I have found that the thing that makes where you live a home is happiness. That elusive thing that makes you glad to be back there, relaxed and content.

Might not feel homely to you, but what about your kids/wife or gf, what do they think?

I think lots of crap lying around (in a tidy kind of way) is the key.

Extensions don't make a home, people and their faults do.

ATB

Simon

It's not the house that makes somewhere a home it's the people that live in it that do that....we've lived in this house for nearly 3 years and the hall and kitchen still aren't properly decorated lol , everywhere is usualy a mess rather than a 'show home' and it smells a bit of cats....... BUT it feels like home - I suppose because we live our lives here rather than use it to impress people who come to visit...... We do have friends with big expensive immaculate houses but you go round and they just feel cold and unwelcoming because they're just too tidy and there are too many rooms you just know no one ever uses - plus it's all too 'designed'.......

Oh, and I am sort of a 'professional' but from experience you can't really create a 'home' by specifying a colour for the walls.......

[Edited on 27/2/10 by D Beddows]

I agree with most of whats been said before. Personally, I think an imaculately clean house will never feel like home, moe so for a house thats been decorated to be easy to clean. I'm not a fan of 'Open plan' either, I think it lacks character.

My advice to you is to think about the house you grew up in, and your parents/grandparents houses. Obviously don't try and completely replicate them but think about what made them home.

I lived with a guy who's dad owned the flat and was obviously intending to sell as soon as his son left uni, the flat was good and had just been done up but you could tell it had been done as an investment and it never felt like home.

I don't think a proffesional is the best way to go, a home has to develop on its own, It has to link the past to the future. If everything matches and theres too much space it will just look like a hotel suite.

I've bought and renovated a few properties and been very happy with the results. In reality the missus is the "designer" whereas I'm the "installer" of whatever she has chosen.

A few things from your post:

Show home - to me that screams buckets of cream paint? We have cream in the hallway, but other than that we have boxtree green in the living room, red in the kitchen, blue and white bathroom, and in the bedrooms each one has a feature colour wall.

Bungalow - I've always felt that they lack character generally and as has been said above they generate images of the elderly in my mind.

New home - I'm not sure whether you mean new to you, or new full stop. It's all down to personal preference I suppose but personally I've not seen many "new" houses with any character to them.

For me personally a "home" should be somewhere with loads of character, plenty of space both inside and out and with "relaxing" type features, such as woodburner, large double ended bath etc. If you can find enough room to make the missus a walk in wardrobe/dressing room then that's worth millions of brownie points!!

Oh, and a mahoosive garage is a must!!

I'm in the same situation and I'm finishing off my house ready for sale.

My neighbours are great, it's a very quiet area, I have a 22' garage, two sheds and two awesome kids that keep the house messy!

But it doesn't feel like 'home'.

?

quote:

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Originally posted by morcus


My advice to you is to think about the house you grew up in, and your parents/grandparents houses. Obviously don't try and completely replicate them but think about what made them home.

---

i wonder if its got anything to do with modern lifestyles and living, we have to work so much harder now to get anything worth owning, employers, private or public want their pound of flesh and some.... I find it very difficult to not think about work because without it i cant do and have all the things i like, maybe thats why its harder to relax.

I suppose its something else we can blame the government for!

easy one to answer........
get some kids in to scribble on the walls, leave toys and clothes lying around also get them to leave sharp bits of lego in the hall so you step on them bare foot on the way to the bathroom .........

next get yourself some pets like
first a large parrot that sings the Eastenders and match of the day theme tune
second a good mix is three jack russells and a tom cat end less fun as the cat slashes at one dog then they two dash in to assist there mate. who proably started it in the first place..
now you will be able to put the cushions back on the sofa upright the coffee table and put the hoover round and clean up mess
the hoover is quite important as it drowns out the shrieking and woofing the parrot is still making as it wants to join in the fight which has of course ended but like some delinquent soccer fan its still cheering
at this point you can put the washing away ....when you get to the laundry basket you will find one of the dogs asleep by now curled up on top the clothes it will be the white dog on the black top or vice versa......

there you go kids and pets.

no ! you are right ourplace sounds like a zoo not a home .i think i envy you for your troubles.
hope you get your answer
cheers les g

A home

has to be decorated with what you like and not what looks nice.

Also

a home is where you and your family live and you are all happy.

If your family feels like home, and you don't, it's time to spent some more time in the garage.

Get a wc in it, a microwave oven and off you go.

I am 100% sure, it will feel like home straight away.

No idea, but I know we lived in a big apartment in a perfect location, that was once chosen for a film set. Although the Hollywood guy who came in said it was too nice for what they had in mind, so it wasn't used after all. Very unfortunately, the guy who owned the place would never sell to us, or the lady upstairs, so we all moved out.

Our present house, in another province, is obviously much bigger and more practical, but it still doesn't feel like home, after 11 years. Don't tell my other half that one.

we only moved in about 4 months ago but it felt like home very quickly.
the house was gutted after it was brought and we refurbed it, we got to choose pretty much everything.

nice warm colours, soft lighting and nice temperature make it feel nice, the loft only had 100mm when we moved in and it never had a cosy feeling, topped it up to 270 and it feel snug now, walls are being done soon as on a really cold day you loose that feeling, having comfortable things around you too, really squidgy sofas that you sink into and lots soft cushions etc

also having personal things around you will make it feel a lot more homely.

in the lounge we have loads of photos of us, some from holidays, some just in the garden etc.

when we go on holiday we always got some sort of picture souvenir and these are on the wall up the stairs eg.
Egypt: both of us on camels
Rome: a really nice water paining of the coliseum by people who paint them in the streets and a similar oil one while in Paris.

in the spare room / office we have have a montage of photos, tickets etc of things we have done together.

that and the trail of things the mrs leaves in her path, you can tell exactly where shes been in the house!

[Edited on 27/2/10 by dan__wright]