We've all been there:
The spanner slips,
The molten blob of iron makes a bee line for your trainer,
The cut you measured three times before making no longer fits,
The price went up 5 minutes before you decided to buy,
FU1+2, (say no more)
What is that involuntary first response ??
Mix,
You not entered your own pole yet!?
one you missed could well be:
oh, bugger!
Ned.
can i have a combo of all of the above in one
mines a 3 hit combo.... argh s*** f****** b******....
Well spotted Ned
Bo---cks it is then
Mick
You also missed of the "c" word (intentionally?) which is probably one of my most used words to follow the f--- it shout
Mine tends to vary according to the occasion. Normally one or several of b-ll-cks, sh-t, cr-p, w-nk-r, t-ts. However, I have also been known to utter these fabulous words... "f-ck it all, where's the beer?"
Good poll, mick!
It all depends on the occasion, and who I am with.
If my son was in the garage (he's 6) I would stay clear of b0ll0x or Feckit. Perhaps a moments seething silence would be the best responce!
If I was in the same room as a parent/granparent, bloody would be about my lot.
When i am on my own, or with fellow locosters, and having had one of the forementioned disasters (normally >1 at a time) the air turns bluer than a
night with Lilly Savage and Chubby Brown.
All the best,
Mark
Curiously i never use the word C?*t.
quote:
Originally posted by Mark H
If my son was in the garage (he's 6) I would stay clear of b0ll0x or Feckit.
Chubby brown? (who- or what?)
Am I showing my age?
Ned.
Yes. Next question.
DJ
You're not likely to know about Chubby Brown unless you've seen him in a club, or bought one of his videos. You'll NEVER see him on
TV! Very, very blue...
Think Jethro x 10 for rudeness.
[Edited on 1/10/03 by David Jenkins]
Good Poll!
When an error occurs I generally find that the phrase "YOU F**KING B**TARD" improves the situation.
Although last weekend my parents neighbour (building in their garage) did have occasion to shout back "WHO's A F**KING B**TARD?"
Cheers
Nick
TWAT!!!!
Now there's a word. My favourite by far
twats a good un.
chubby brown did a santa song, went like this:
oi f****** santa claus, wheres me f****** bike?/ i've unwrapped all these twat presents here, theres sod all that i like!
cant remember the rest but its well funny! anyone remember any if his gags?!?
quote:I usually find it's either:
Originally posted by timf
always use
sh.....ugar when small children are about
When I lost the top of my thumb I went
"Oh deary me!"
Cheers
Chris
quote:
"Oh deary me!"
"You little piece of f**king sh*t", rising towards the end in bitterness, speed and volume suffices for almost all occassions. Except when
the kids are around the it's "Ooooh arhhhh blimey"
I have a friend who will wave his tools towards the heavens and scream "I'll f**king get you for that you b**tard!"
Cheers,
Neil.
Once I cross-threaded a spark plug into an aluminum head. The next day, I was driving to a semi-important meeting when the plug blew out.
When my wife came to pick me up at the garage I made it to, I hopped into the car and said, "F___!", then turned around to see my 15
month-old daughter in the baby seat.
About a week later, I had her in a cart at the grocery store and as we're walking around, she starts:
"F___, f___, f___, f___, f___, f___, f___, ..."
I about choked, and leaned over and growled some kind of threat in her ear. Can't tell you how relieved I was when she stopped!
Pete
lol!
John Cooper Clarke does a really good monologue about this.
Mick
similiar thing happended to me, having a small disagreemwnt with the missus in the car on the way to the supermarket and told her to F*%$ off,
forgetting our 3 year old was in the car, within 2 minutes of of starting our weekly shop, our son told the woman in the grocery dept to f%$£ off!!!
2 minutes later, the missus was shopping alone and we were back in the car.
I like what the missus says
ar*ey bo***cksy w*nk
Kind of rolls of the tongue.
- Greg H
quote:
Originally posted by MK9R
You also missed of the "c" word (intentionally?) which is probably one of my most used words to follow the f--- it shout
quote:
Originally posted by James
P.S. Someone I site next to did once say that sitting near me is sometimes like sitting with someone suffering from Tourettes!
[Edited on 3/10/03 by James]
Well, if you're going to be pedantic... "work"?
rgds,
David
While I was welding my frame I decided I needed to rotate the part. Apparently the glove I had on my hand must have been in the way because for some
reason it was'nt there when I grabbed a fist full of firey hell!! I let loose with an "otherworldly" string of "colorful
phrases" that to this day hang as a dense fog over the driveway.
I may have been speaking in tounges as I see none of them on the poll..
I will use the your poll as a reference the next time I do something like that..
thanks Fletch
MARCUS AND HICOST
Now thenlads lets not go there
I was just wondering what marcus said when he tried his best to remove his leg with the BIG cutting disc,at the end where his wedding tackle is.
And also hicost must have had a few choice words after removing half his right foot (heel) with boiling water.
quote:
Originally posted by timf
quote:
Originally posted by James
P.S. Someone I site next to did once say that sitting near me is sometimes like sitting with someone suffering from Tourettes!
[Edited on 3/10/03 by James]
you could at least spell the f**king work properly - Tourette's -
Having not picked up an arc welder till a few years ago I was unaware of just how quickly the rods heat up.
I’d just struck the rod up and then decided I wanted it bending a little lower,
first three fingers of left hand burnt (oh sh*t)
pull hand off rod and leave lumps of my fingers behind (Oh F*cking h*ll) :mad
dunk hand in cold water bucket (Ohhhh F*CKING A*SE W*NKING H*LL that hurt)
Favourite phrase for non painful incidents though is FUBAR (for those of you that haven’t seen Saving Private Ryan that’s F*cked Up Beyond All
Recognition)
Nice to see the Boll*cks are out in front
This website translates other websites for tourettes sufferers.
http://www.design4online.com/twat/fuck.asp
Funnily enough when i entered locostbuilders i didn't notice any difference!
Ian
http://www.design4online.com/twat/fuck.asp?site=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.locostbuilders.co.uk%2Fviewthread.php%3Ftid%3D7805%26page%3D4
does that work?
lol its different every time as well!!!
[Edited on 10/10/03 by JoelP]
I wish I knew what some of them meant. I read it out loud and couldn't stop laughing. I reckon people who claim to have Tourettes are just taking
the piss, the flamperjabbing porkgobblers..
yours, Pete.
i just did it again and your bit came up as 'anyone seen my camel ARSE FISTER'!!lol
They do tend to enjoy that (I've heard).
Fartsniffing mingepicking chutneyguzzler.
Almost on a par with Muffin the Mule apparently. ( 2 choruses of I Like Muffin ).
yours, Pete.