Copy of e-mail received by B&Q customer services:
Dear Sir/Madam
My congratulations to you on getting a yacht to leave the UKon 28th
November 2004, sail 27,354 miles around the world and arrive back 72
days later.
Could you please let me know when the kitchen I ordered 96 days ago
will be arriving from your warehouse 13 miles away?
Yours Sincerley
John Roberts
LOL