The Geography of a Woman

Between 18 and 20, a woman is like Africa. Half discovered, half-wild, naturally beautiful with fertile deltas.

Between 21 and 30, a woman is like America. Well developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.

Between 31 and 35, she is like India. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of her beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like France. Gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, she is like Yugoslavia. Lost the war and haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.

Between 51 and 60, she is like Russia. Very wide and borders are un-patrolled. The frigid climate keeps people away.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Mongolia. A glorious and all-conquering past, but alas, no future.

After 70, she becomes like Afghanistan. Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.


The Geography of a Man

Between 15 and 90, a man is like Zimbabwe. Ruled by a dick.