Got this at work today, it made me laugh.


Dear:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that
the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of
space and valuable resources.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now
monitors all other system activity.

Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing
7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I
can't seem to keep Wife 1.0
in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications.

I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't
work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!


Thanks,

A Troubled User.



REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many people upgrade
from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a utilities and
entertainment program.

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run
EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to
Girlfriend 7.0. It
is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once
installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is
designed to not allow this. Look in
your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support." I recommend that
you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing
the background
application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C: APOLOGIZE. Because
ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system
will return to
normal anyway. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high
maintenance.

Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0,
Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these
programs. Improper
use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this
happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase
additional software. I recommend
Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short
Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause
irreversible damage to the operating
system.



Best of luck,

Tech Support

Hehe. My dad got sent that a few weeks ago.

thats been around a few years actually