A HUSBAND IS AT HOME WATCHING FOOTBALL WHEN HIS WIFE QUIETLY INTERRUPTS,
"DARLING, COULD YOU FIX THE LIGHT IN THE HALLWAY? IT'S BEEN FLICKERING FOR WEEKS NOW"
HE LOOKED AT HER AND SAYS ANGRILY;
"FIX THE LIGHT? NOW? DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE AN ELECTRICIANS LOGO PRINTED ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO!"
THE WIFE ASKED,
"WELL THEN, COULD YOU FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR? IT WON'T CLOSE RIGHT."
TO WHICH HE REPLIED,
"FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR? DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE HOTPOINT WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO."
FINE, SHE SAID,
"THEN YOU COULD AT LEAST FIX THE STEPS TO THE FRONT DOOR?" THEY'RE ABOUT
TO BREAK."
"I'M NOT A DAMN CARPENTER AND I DON'T WANT TO FIX THE STEPS", HE SAID.
"DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE WOODIES DIY WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T
THINK SO.
"THATS IT" HE SAID. "I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS - I'M OFF TO THE PUB!!! " SO HE WENT OFF TO THE PUB FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS.
BUT BY THEN HE HAD STARTED TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT HOW HE TREATED HIS WIFE, SO HE DECIDED TO GO HOME AND HELP OUT.WAS WORKING AND AS HE WENT TO GET A
BEER, HE NOTICED THE FRIDGE DOOR WAS FIXED.
"DARLING", HE ASKED, "HOW DID ALL THIS GET FIXED?"
SHE SAID,
"WELL, WHEN YOU LEFT I SAT OUTSIDE AND CRIED. JUST THEN A NICE YOUNG MAN CAME PAST AND ASKED ME WHAT WAS WRONG, SO I TOLD HIM.
HE OFFERED TO DO ALL THE REPAIRS AND IN RETURN ALL I HAD TO DO WAS EITHER GO TO BED WITH HIM OR BAKE A CAKE."
"SO WHAT KIND OF CAKE DID YOU BAKE HIM?" ASKED THE HUSBAND.
"HELLOOOOO.......!" SHE REPLIED "CAN YOU SEE DELIA SMITH WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO!"