A very loud, unattractive, hard-faced woman walks into Salisbury Big W with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
The door greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Big W Nice children you've got there -- are they twins?"
The fat ugly woman stops screaming long enough to snarl:
"Of course they bloody aren't! The oldest, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins?..... Do you think they look alike, ya dickead?"
"Absolutely not," replies the greeter, "I just can't believe anyone would f**k you twice!"