MAKES MY EYES TEAR UP, SUCH A HAPPY ENDING !

A couple had only been married for two weeks and the husband, although
very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with
his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.

"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face," he answered. I'm going to ! have a
beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the
refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12
different countries: Germany , Holland , Japan , India , etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could
think of saying was, "! Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... You know...
they have frozen glasses... "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him
by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge be er
mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just
holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the
bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't
be long. I'll be! right back. I promise. OK?"

"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took
out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in
blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches.

"But my sweet honey... at the bar. you know there's swearing, dirty
words and all that..."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN SH*T! SIT YOUR ASS
DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR
HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR!
THAT SH*T IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?"

and....they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story? --

Fair warms the cockles of your heart, don't it.

Not too far wrong either....

"Married" and "Life" in the same sentence ??