And as said above. Cold carbs.
Parking issues, or anti social car/bike behaviour
I started this for fun, as i seemed to of got a bit tyed up on youtube with the above!!
My best one !!
I live in a small close, and about 20 plus years ago, a guy who didnt live in our close used to park a BIG 8 wheeler tipper, you know the type of
thing, enormous piece of machiney, and when on the road, NOTHING gets passed! as they only do 56 mph
The owner of this piece of road blocking junk, had been warned, by the locals and the police informed, and the company he worked for were informed,
yet he / they still ignored the lot
any way, to get into our close, you had to drive on the road and pavement, and a couple of front lawns just to get passed
so, someone, not sure who, placed 6 " nails at an angle on the tyres, so when mr Arsehole drove off every tyre was punctured
any way the large tipper remained there for a day or so, as i beleive most of the tyres had been punctured, well, they all looked very flat!
after a couple of days the large piece of machinery was removed, and NEVER CAME BACK!!!! result !!
Now on to my son in law,
Must be 18 ish years ago, were they used to live,
EVERY work day around 0600, his neighbour would come out and start a large 1000cc plus, motorbike up, with open cans , and very loud, and leave it
idling as he went in and did what ever ! for a good 10 mins this went on for a good couple of weeks, untill my son in law, waited untill the bike was
started, went out and put a large sign up on the bike, took the keys out and went home
the noise had stopped, and NEVER did the bike ever start again. not while My Daughter lived there !
The sign said, the keys are in the drain, with an arrow, pointing to the closest drain!!!
The keys were actually on his roof !! and just for info, a very very sharp nail at around 60-65% is the optimum angle
just thought i would share with you
I could go on, but some of the experiences of my life are quit harrowing, !!!
steve
I used to be embarrassed about starting my bike early in the morning, it was a standard 600 on quiet cans and wasn't particularly noisy at idle. I still tried to ride off as soon as I could. It was bloody difficult too, a cold carb fed bike with a very twitchy throttle!
The best answer to all of these neighbourhood problems is simply to hammer frozen sausages into their front lawn one night and watch in amazement at
the results wildlife will go to for a bit of sausage.
Im sure plenty here will know where that idea originated from.
I freewheel my 125 scooter down the hill before I started it just so I don't disturb the neighbours.
And as said above. Cold carbs.
I used to push my Norton up to the top of the road, to start it, but when i bought a Goldwing, i could start in the garage, under my Parents
bedroom
and they never heard a thing
Many years ago I lived along what is now the A14 with the M11 ending just outside the front door, we had been there a few years when road construction began and had to fight for a lay-by outside for parking , came home one afternoon to find someone parked in the middle of the lay-by so I could park in front or behind without blocking a driveway , I got out and asked the driver politely if he could move forward so I could park , his response was I could wait until he was ready! Big mistake! I parked my VW camper van tight to his front bumper then my dads Volvo tight to his rear then told him he would wait until I was ready . 1/2 later he was knocking at our door saying he was in a hurry. Tough! He threatened to call the police so I told him where the nearest public phone was , 3 miles away, enjoy your walk , this was in the pre mobile days . He waited 3 hours before I let him out telling him that in future he might park with a bit more consideration. Not a happy bunny!
Bikes are a bit of a problem. Having been an all year biker I too had a loud bike just so that filtering through traffic was safer as you could
certainly hear it coming. Starting early in the morning and not waking everyone up was tricky and in the winter it was prone to carb icing if not
warmed up being a twin V with the carbs in the middle. So I to let it idle for a while but it was unavoidable really.
I think I'd have mentioned it to the guy first and asked if there was a solution perhaps just starting it in the garage with the door open or
wheeling it further from the houses.
Anti-social behaviour's never good and noisey engines are always set to irritate. Always a good reason just to start the car/bike and set off.
If you take it easy for a few miles the engine will warm itself up and all should be well.
Tyres never like nails 
When I used to chef at a private members club, we had a neighbor to the building who used to complain every day about the cars and bikes leaving after
hours and arriving early. He even requested that staff pushed the motorbikes down the road before starting them. The kicker was that he was a member
and ate there daily.
Unsurprisingly, after 3 days of 5am carpark doughnuts the complaints stopped.
quote:
Originally posted by joneh
When I used to chef at a private members club, we had a neighbor to the building who used to complain every day about the cars and bikes leaving after hours and arriving early. He even requested that staff pushed the motorbikes down the road before starting them. The kicker was that he was a member and ate there daily.
Unsurprisingly, after 3 days of 5am carpark doughnuts the complaints stopped.
About 10 years ago I we lived in a very narrow urban street- the type that was only wide enough for a vehicle in one direction. I was driving towards
my home and in the opposite direction came a delivery lorry. I stopped next to a parking space about twice the length of the lorry expecting them to
pull in and then carry on driving. Transpires they wanted to stop to do a delivery but instead of pulling forward 6 foot into the parking space and
stopping they pulled to a stop inches in front of the front of my car (IE completely blocking the road) and started trying to man-handle a sofa out of
the back of the lorry. I got out and asked if it would not have been possible to park in the parking space rather than block the road to which the
driver said "I could do but I'm not going to. I'm doing a delivery- wait". So, based on the fact that my car was parked directly
in front of their lorry I just switched off the engine and walked to my house and made a cup of tea and went and sat on my front wall. As soon as
they'd delivered their item they got back in and started shouting to move my car to which I replied "I could do but I'm not going to.
I'm having a cup of tea- wait". Unfortunately for them I don't like drinking my tea too hot, it was a nice day so a bit of sun-bathing
was in order and the road was too narrow to reverse. I think they quite rapidly realized there was a limit to how pissed off they could be......
Did it change their behaviour in future? Probably not. Was it amusing, yes.
To be fair I only took about five / ten minutes to drink my tea and I the sun was a bit too hot so it wasn't as protracted a wait as it could
have been.
The really mean one I did was on the same road when again driving home. I was in my battered and tatty Micra which someone had driven into the back of
so the rear wheel arch had a definitely not IVA approved rather sharp metal crease sticking out of the rear wheel arch. I almost got to my house down
the narrow section (wall to wall parked cars) before a brand new BMW came hooning in the opposite direction before slamming on the anchors one car
length in front of a parking space. The driver started gesticulating for me to move backwards. I leaned out and shouted that it was about 80 metres I
would have to reverse and couldn't he just reverse in to which he shook his head and started moving fowards. So I duly stuck it in reverse and
started going backwards. All the way up the road he was about 2 inches from my front bumper. Eventually 80m up the road I found a space I could
reverse into. The space was small so it wasn't possible to pull in very near to the kerb without doing a 40 point parking manoever (so I
didn't bother) and when I parked I let the front of the car swing beyond parallel to the kerb so the back of the car was slightly sticking out.
The space was clearly quite narrow for the big shiny BMW. I started beckoning him to pull forward in the traditional manner. Inevitably when the front
bumper of his car got to my rear wheel arch that the horrible crunchy squeeky paint-shredding noises started as the rear wheel arch did it's
thing. I just carried on with the beckoning and gave him a thumbs up. The funny thing is looking rather upset he did actually carry on and trashed the
complete side to his car. Turns out he's one of the local estate agents.
"I think I'd have mentioned it to the guy first and asked if there was a solution perhaps just starting it in the garage with the door open or wheeling it further from the houses.
If you ex son in law did the dead it's probably just as well he's the ex. Filthy bugger. Although apparently it's actually not illegal. Or rather it can be depending on how you obtain the body. I almost wrote "come across" but......
I'm on the receiving end of noisy vehicles so I feel for those folk who've asked people to be quiet when leaving. I have a bedroom window
that overlooks a neighbours drive, that neighbour's son uses the drive as a storage area for a commercial cleaning business, pulls up in a
clattery knackered diesel van most mornings, smashes a chain off the metal gate at 5am, hooks up a giant water bowser with the engine idling the whole
time, then clatters the gate shut and hoons off at full pelt. It's completely antisocial behaviour and destroys my sleep quality (I work late,
rise late).
It's only a matter of time before I start finding creative ways of forcing him to be more reasonable and not keep industrial cleaning kit in a
residential area (not actually allowed by local council laws).
Joneh - I'd think that that neighbour was being pretty reasonable asking you to minimise noise when leaving an area where folk are sleeping,
especially if your mode of transport is noisy. If you did donuts after I'd asked nicely, I'd be calling the police, videoing it and putting
calls in to the local council to have the licensing investigated. Businesses have a responsibility to minimise disruption to their local community.
Most of them understand this.
[Edited on 4/12/20 by coyoteboy]
quote:
Originally posted by coyoteboy
I'm on the receiving end of noisy vehicles so I feel for those folk who've asked people to be quiet when leaving. I have a bedroom window that overlooks a neighbours drive, that neighbour's son uses the drive as a storage area for a commercial cleaning business, pulls up in a clattery knackered diesel van most mornings, smashes a chain off the metal gate at 5am, hooks up a giant water bowser with the engine idling the whole time, then clatters the gate shut and hoons off at full pelt. It's completely antisocial behaviour and destroys my sleep quality (I work late, rise late).
It's only a matter of time before I start finding creative ways of forcing him to be more reasonable and not keep industrial cleaning kit in a residential area (not actually allowed by local council laws).
Joneh - I'd think that that neighbour was being pretty reasonable asking you to minimise noise when leaving an area where folk are sleeping, especially if your mode of transport is noisy. If you did donuts after I'd asked nicely, I'd be calling the police, videoing it and putting calls in to the local council to have the licensing investigated. Businesses have a responsibility to minimise disruption to their local community. Most of them understand this.
[Edited on 4/12/20 by coyoteboy]
.
I just thought of another one of my history,
Were my Parents live, and still do, is a very respectable place, big houses, and very open plan, and part of the i presume deeds, means you cant have
hedges or fences around the gardens, so its very open plan
we used to have an issue with dogs fouling the front garden, and always at night, and because my parents lived on a corner, their front garden seemed
and still is, by far the largest piece of open dog pooing ground in the area
A friend and i used to walk to the local pub, have a few, and walk home, normally getting home around midnight, on our return, we could see a large
dog, doing its stuff on my lawn, this was noted, and observed over a couple of nights, and the mutt was followed back to his house at a distance
The dog was scratching at the front door, and owner lets him in
The owner of this house was part of a family who owned outright a major food brand in the uk, incredibly wealthy, and he flaunted this lavishly
Anyway, about 0200 after good night at the pub, we poured all of the poo through his letter box, that had been collected over the previous week,
what was left was distributed over his from memory three Rolls Royces but could of been four!
The dog was never ever seen again!
Now to end this, the Owner of the dog, and as said was a part of a very well name , i believe had a puncture (nothing to do with me !!!) and
decided
to change the wheel himself, however what ever he did, i do not know, but he manged to be under a car, when the jack failed, and he was crushed to
death
It made the news, the papers etc and as i know the names etc and address, i googled it, and the dates match, that i was getting well drunk at the
age of 17!
Steve
I have a BMW M140i and whenever you start it it goes through a cold start proceedure. Starts at 1200 rpm and takes a little while to come down to
650rpm.
I normally leave early for work so what I tend to do is get myself sorted and settled then I press the start button and drive straight off. It's
a bit of a pain but I know how much iyt would annoy me if the boot was on the other foot.
In my teens, for nearly two years, someone in the next road set off their car alarm, every single morning, about 45 minutes before I got up. It was
annoying enough for me - how his next-door neighbours coped, I don't know.
One of my current neighbours and his ex-wife, used to have overnight poker parties, mid-week, with the French doors open. Lots of drunken noise and
disturbance through the night, when I needed to get up for work the next day. One week, I happened to have booked the next day off work. The poker
finished about 06:30 and just after 08:00, I started cutting up steel with an angle grinder, in the corner of the garden closest to their bedroom
window - they never did it again!
[Edited on 5/12/20 by SteveWalker]
The dog poo story reminds me of another, living beside the A14 at the end of the M11 it was common to get vehicles stopping in what was a lay-by for residents parking , often dumping fast food wrappers etc. This particular day my dad had been out clearing up rubbish and cutting the grass and was packing up his stuff when an estate car driven by a guy pulled up and promptly let an Alsatian out which did his business, The dog was put back in the car , the passenger got into the drivers seat and the guy got into the passenger side , as the engine was started my dad scooped up the dog mess on a spade, tapped the passengers window and when it opened said “ here you go , take your rubbish with you” then dumped the crap on his lap. The guy then threatened my dad who just said “ not a good idea when I’ve got this spade in my hands , now #### off! They did drive about a 1/4 mile further before sopping at the Cambridge crematorium and dumping it
On a far less controversial note - electric cars are normally very quiet, but mine has a reversing beeper. Now this is a VERY good idea as without it
pedestrians won't know when I'm reversing out of a parking space, but at 6 in the morning in a quiet cul-de-sac it can be a bit...
penetrating. Whenever possible I do try to turn it off before I select reverse!
I reckon that if I was still commuting into London my neighbours wouldn't be too impressed with me serenading them at 06:15 every weekday...
quote:
Originally posted by David Jenkins
On a far less controversial note - electric cars are normally very quiet, but mine has a reversing beeper. Now this is a VERY good idea as without it pedestrians won't know when I'm reversing out of a parking space, but at 6 in the morning in a quiet cul-de-sac it can be a bit... penetrating. Whenever possible I do try to turn it off before I select reverse!
I reckon that if I was still commuting into London my neighbours wouldn't be too impressed with me serenading them at 06:15 every weekday...
quote:
Originally posted by starterman
Reverse in and then you can drive out, quietly. Now that's not rocket science
quote:
Originally posted by David Jenkins
quote:
Originally posted by starterman
Reverse in and then you can drive out, quietly. Now that's not rocket science
Except that my charging port is on the front of the car, and my charger is on the wall ahead of it.
[Edited on 5/12/20 by David Jenkins]
Reverse in and then you can drive out, quietly. Now that's not rocket science
Your car should have a switch to turn the reverse bleeper off there not allowed to be used before 6am and after11pm
All buses have a switch for this reason
Jacko
You should read what I posted! 
I said that I do turn it off, when I remember - which is, in fact, most of the time.
I assume that one of the later amendments has made these beepers legal on cars? As The Road Vehicles (Construction and Use) Regulations 1986: Section
99: States:
(3) No person shall sound, or cause or permit to be sounded, on a road any reversing alarm fitted to a vehicle—
(a) unless the vehicle is a goods vehicle which has a maximum gross weight not less than 2000 kg, a bus, engineering plant, or a works truck
Yeah I was just thinking that, I thought they all had an override.
Oh I replied without seeing the second page. Or reading the first fully apparently. I'll go back to sleep.
[Edited on 6/12/20 by coyoteboy]
There is a requirement for all electric cars to make some sounds when they are driving forwards at less than 20mph - basically, for the benefit of
blind people, elderly, and so on. The tyre noise is enough over that speed. This requirement doesn't really address the problem of reversing out
of parking spaces, where the noise can't be heard because it comes out of the front of the car, and electric cars are VERY quiet at low speeds.
Because of this, some (not all) manufacturers have fitted reversing beepers for safety reasons - I think this is a very good idea. It's a
substitute for the noise that normally comes out of an internal combustion car (ICE) exhaust.
Note that this beeper is fairly quiet - just loud enough for people to register that there's a car on the move. My original point is that
it's a bit intrusive at 6am in a quiet village!
It would make far more sense for electric cars to make conventional engine noises. a) they are not as intrusive as a beeper and b) we have all been
brought up to recognise the sound of a motor vehicle and associate it with making sure we are in a safe position.
Beeps are plain irritating and prone to confusion about where they are coming from and what they are warning about.
A bloke down our little close has a garage full of harleys with drainpipe exhausts. He had no issues with shaking every window in the street at 6am
every day when he left for work, then spending all evening pissing round with his mates tearing up and down the close. And coming home at 2/3am at the
weekends.
Funny thing is when he went on holiday someone welded his garage door shut and put a can of explaining foam up the exhausts of the bikes left anchored
on the drive... not heard a thing from him in nearly 6 months now.