davrus
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posted on 24/2/11 at 08:44 AM |
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child benifits etc HELP
Hi ya, my wife has decided that after 18 years off marrage she wants to let her hair down, have fun and independents so she has left not only me but
also our 3 sons who are 12,14 and 16.
Now the problem is she has disapeared off the face of the earth and cancelled every single standing order i,e mortgage etc and not given me any
information about any thing at all and left us pritty much in the crap.
Now what my question is can any one tell me what benefits i can claim for now that i am a single parent and where i go in order to get the ball
rolling, this is all new to me and seems like rocket science as she has delt with all our finances through out our marrage..
Many thanks in advance
I know the citizons advise is a good place to start but i was asking the question to save me wasting time as all our bills are due to go out tommorrow
and i havnt got a clue where to start.
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swanny
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posted on 24/2/11 at 08:56 AM |
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you have my sypathies mate.
citizens advice, definate thumbs up from me, unless of course big daves cuts have closed your local branches down. (big society pah!)
have a look here? http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/BenefitsTaxCreditsAndOtherSupport/BeginnersGuideToBenefits/DG_4016266
i'd take a day off work if you can and try and sort as much as possible, including a trip to the CAB, phoning as many folk as you can think of.
why has she cancelled all the standing orders? has she taken any of the money to fund her new life? i'd make sure all the existing accounts etc
are locked down, changed passwords if possible.
[Edited on 24/2/11 by swanny]
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Daddylonglegs
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posted on 24/2/11 at 08:59 AM |
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Sorry to hear about your bombshell mate. But the priority I would say is to contact as many of the companies etc. that have payments due now or in the
near future and explain the situation. You then most definitely need to go to citizen's advice to get help with the legalities and what you are
entitled to.
I am sure that all on here will give you as much advice as possible, but the main thing is keep everyone who you owe money to informed and I am sure
you will get things sorted.
Keep your chin up and things will get better.
Good luck.
John
It looks like the Midget is winning at the moment......
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davrus
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posted on 24/2/11 at 09:09 AM |
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Cheers for your comments. She dealt with every single bit of finance, benifits etc and to be honest with you she has left things in a bit of a state,
her fileing system is a shambles with paperwork in there dating back to 1998 and beleive me she shuvs paperwork all over the place, i have managed to
get the day off work to try and sort this out but it feels like i am banging my head against a brick wall as i dont know where to start,
I will keep my chin up for the sake of the kits and get my self out of this hole she has left us in.
Many thanks
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Macbeast
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posted on 24/2/11 at 09:13 AM |
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Did you have a joint account ? Has she cleaned it out ?
There should be old bank statements that will show you what standing orders were in place.
I should go to your bank and ask for their help in sorting out.
Benefits, as far as I know, are all means tested so if you have any major assets (eg house ) or income above a certain level you will not qualify.
I'm addicted to brake fluid, but I can stop anytime.
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jabbahutt
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posted on 24/2/11 at 09:50 AM |
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Your bank should be able to provide a complete list of standing orders and direct debits so you can begin getting things back in place to pay bills
etc. Definitely a trip to CAB who will be able to advise on benefits etc and point you in the right direction.
Best of luck
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rayward
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posted on 24/2/11 at 09:55 AM |
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sorry to hear that, had a similar thing with my ex a lot of years ago (no kids involved fortunately)
do it one thing at a time,
Bank Accounts secured, so she can;t take any more cash from..
House Locks Changed.
then sort out the financial stuff going by most important first
keep the roof over your heads...
so mortgage, gas elec, water and poll tax where my first ones to sort.
after that everyone you owe will send you a letter at some point,,,, deal with them as they come in,and speak to each company and explain the
situation to them, some will help,
go into the bank too, they should be able to give you a list of the cancelled direct debits , then you can tick them off one by one as they are sorted
out.
as far as the child benefits etc go,, i think its payed by BACS into the bank account now, so may still be active, when you receive a payment thee
will be a reference number on there to help you get in touch.
hth
Ray
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Ninehigh
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posted on 24/2/11 at 10:12 AM |
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You should be entitled to working and child tax credit, the only problem I forsee is if it was a joint claim (likely) and now you're taking her
off it'll have to be cancelled and started again. This might well mean they'll have to confirm it with her (yeah I know, but this is the
same place that thinks a P60 is an estimate of my wages from that year)
To be honest with benefits the best thing you can do is apply for the lot of them, every single one. The jobcentre won't tell you what
you're entitled to (even though they say they do).
Also like everyone else has said, mortgage, water, electric, gas, food. For everyone else (especially those you don't know about) I say wait
until they send you a letter asking for payment and then send them one back (I'd have a standard one) explaining what's happened and that
you'd love to pay them, can you set up a direct debit please?
Then again there's a nice little bit of spite in refusing to pay some things (for example the HP for her car, or the credit on the TV) and
because it's in her name they'll chase her for it. It won't happen anytime soon but eventually she'll get a letter saying
something along the lines of "Pay us now or we'll send someone round and drag you to court and then we'll take you for everything!
Unless you contact us of course"
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MikeFellows
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posted on 24/2/11 at 10:28 AM |
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pro-active is always better than re-active
get in touch with any financial places, most are usually very good, its when you put your head in the sand that they are not. the last thing you will
need is your credit rating starting to drop
fair enough on the bills front though, just wait for the letters, gets you an extra 2 weeks or so.
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MikeR
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posted on 24/2/11 at 10:42 AM |
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If things get desperate, dont pay the water bill. It will screw your credit rating but .......... legally its the one service they cant cut off no
matter how far behind you are (but i believe this is due to change).
Try contacting her mum, explain you don't want to argue, your happy for now to let everything go via an intermediary (her) but you need to sort
some things out to keep the roof over the kids heads ......... i'd hope she'll help as its her grandchildren that she's risking
losing contact with & putting on the street.
(my experience is grandparents REALLY don't want to lose access to their grandchildren).
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tony-devon
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posted on 24/2/11 at 12:23 PM |
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sorry to have to say but do expect to be given the run around by the benefits people and the system in general, at a guess you will see child tax
credits, these will depend on your earnings, unless your on minimum wage I doubt you will see working tax credits.
child tax credits are a lottery, everyone I know gets different amounts, I got £19 in a whole year!, then got court proceedings against me for
overpayments of £1570 for that year?
then theres child benefit, thats linked to age and number of children
the system is a complete joke.
to be honest that would be the least of my worries, child benefit will continue to go to the same account, unless they have been notified that your
wife has left, or is out of the country for a period etc.
as others have said, I would concentrate on the important bills, mortgage and council tax, dont forget to apply for your 25% discount on council tax
as your now single occupancy.
any forms that you fill in, I would advise where possible to keep copies, and always post 1st class recorded, this has saved me a lot ofhassle on more
than one occasion
best of luck
[Edited on 24/2/11 by tony-devon]
heavy is good, heavy is reliable, and if it breaks, hit them with it
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carpmart
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posted on 24/2/11 at 02:14 PM |
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Got nothing practical to add to the good advice you have already got, but just wanted to say KEEP YA CHIN UP!
You only live once - make the most of it!
Radical Clubsport, Kwaker motor
'94 MX5 MK1, 1.8
F10 M5 - 600bhp Daily Hack
Range Rover Sport - Wife's Car
Mercedes A class - Son's Car
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blakep82
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posted on 24/2/11 at 03:08 PM |
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re the benefits, get into the job centre to speak to someone about it too! they'll see if theres anything else you might be entitled to to help
out
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