At work i get to read some of the more interesting insurance claims that people make and this one jump out and made me squirm.
A gentleman is currently sueing starbucks coffee for a large ammount and the details have been passed to the insurers for info.
apparently he went to the loo for no 2's and the seat was not securily fixed and it slipped sideways. the said gent managed to have gotten his
wedding tackle between the seat and the rim which cause it to be crushed.
OUCH!!!
thanks for that tim, not long before lunch, ill try not to think about it....
Ned.
yyeeeeeeeaaaaaawwwwww!
A farmer friend of mine got his sack pierced by a barb on the barbed wire fence he was climbing over wearing a pair of shorts, straight in one side
and popping out the other. better stop now im wincing too much to type.
"a gentleman", Tim and "a friend", Col. Hmmmm. Anything else to add?!
If it was me, I would not have told anyone about either of those two incidents.
Reminds me of when i was about 12. I was into model airplanes and dropped one of those small red cans of paint onto my pants. Went through to mum
(about 7 in the morning). She thought I had cut my young chap off!!
Sister is a Doctor and was doing an A and E shift when a bloke came in with a carrier bag and clutching his hand which was evidently bleeding.
Upon further inspection in the carrier bag was a bread knife...............
upon opening up his clenched hand, she did not find a cut from the bread knife but ....................his cock in his hand, roughly hack sawn off
with the aforementioned bread knife.
Family gatherings at our house are fun!
also reminds me about the wide selection on empty deoderant/shampoo bottles/aerosols they keep handy.........................well thats a different
story!
my mum was an a&e nurse and the funniest story she came home with was of the young lady who had decided the whole fish she hat got for tea was very inviting and inserted it in an orafice. ok untill she whent to remove and the rear fin opened up. delivered by doc with forceps ala baby.
That is wrong, man!!
I can undersatand the first cut, but to hack through it........."Ow" (Michael Jackson style)
My wife's a nurse and used to work in A&E, some of her stories would make your eyes water....
so here's one to be getting on with....
A man died in A&e and she and a friend had to lay him out and whatever. Turns out from his notes that he has an implant in his penis so that he
can get 'hard'. anyway the girls decide it would be a laugh to have a look so they 'pump' him up (hidden pump in sack!) but
don't know how to let him down again...... so they stick a needle in till they puncture it.......
Bloody vicious these women..
Back to the spare deodorant cans etc.....
apparently most A&E dept's have such a selection of "tools"!
they are used to remove the caps from such items that have become stuck in places they are not designed to be stuck!
after a quick finger examination they then wedge in the nearest style of can.bottle etc and see if they can thread the lid onto the can to pull the
thing out!
and you think you have experienced some difficult bolt/threading situations! normally M6, M8, M10, not M40, M50, M60 threads,
At least the threads would be well lubed
maybe the threads should be loctite'd prior to insertion to save loosing the caps in the first place!
I wonder if they get threads like this on cateringvan or eastfield sites?
atb
steve
how come there isn't a forum on here for westfields?
They have their own, very similar to this, we don't seem very welcome there, but I am sure we would welcome them here
Doctor friend relates the one about the 'queer' who came in with a vibrator firmly wedged up his ass.
After much tugging, twisting, pulling trying to remove it, the guy finally shouts out 'Leave it alone, just change the batteries for Christs
sake!'
There was (maybe still is) a cycle shop in Kettering (not far from where the Co-op used to be). One night the proprieter of said shop (this is about
30yrs ago) managed to get himself (god knows how) down to the Casualty Dept at Kettering GH. Reason - for some unexplained reason he had managed to
get a set of racing (old curly style) cycle handle bars well and trully stuck up an orofice where the sun seldom shines.
Enjoy.
Rob: Classic!
JGG: An unhappy customer? 
These stories remind me of a friend with a fruity colleague, who actually bragged about the objects he could manage to get into his distensible
orifice. Ultimately, he wound up in the ER, too, with a light bulb in his rectum. The doctor knocked off the end of the bulb and filled it with
plaster of paris to get it out.
Line from 'North Atlantic Squadron', a drinking song:
"The cabin boy, the cabin boy, that nasty little nipper; he stuffed his ass with broken glass and circumcised the skipper!"
Pete
quote:
we don't seem very welcome there, but I am sure we would welcome them here