JUD
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 posted on 6/7/07 at 03:14 PM |
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Dear god help me!
Travelling in France on business - got the joy of CDG airport...
Get there with plenty of time. Settle into the lounge, drinkies and nibblies aplenty. Departure board is saying everything is on time. Looking
good.
Head done thru security, still looking good.
The moment my ar$e hits the seat in the crap departure lounge they announce a 1 hour delay.
Now stuck in a greenhouse of a lounge, sweating my nads off on a rock hard bench.
All I want to do is get home and have a beer. Obviously too much to ask.
Rant over.
Martin
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MK Indy Blade
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bilbo
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 03:21 PM |
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I know exactly the feeling. Sounds like one of my usual friday afternoons. If it's not CD F G it's Schit hol
Hope it's an airline that give you a free drink on the plane 
[Edited on 6/7/07 by bilbo]
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Build Diary: http://bills-locost.blogspot.com/
Web Site: http://locost.atspace.com
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JUD
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 03:29 PM |
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Ho ho ho. Now the board is showing "On time" even tho it is an hour late.
French logic.
Still, I'm getting lots of amusement watching some French chavs assaulting the vending machine. They don't seem able to accept the fact
that it is out of order.
More French logic.
Ho hum.... At least I can post onto Locostbuilder off my Blackberry. Marvels of modern technology.
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MK Indy Blade
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JUD
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 03:33 PM |
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Well now it has gone from "on time" to another additional 30 minute delay.
The art of communication.
Somebody tell me a joke or something - before I kill somebody.
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MK Indy Blade
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Confused but excited.
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 03:41 PM |
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Did you hear the one about the English guy stuck at CDG airport and the French guys kept winding him up by saying the plane was delayed by another
hour, even though it had left on time? 
Tell them about the bent treacle edges!
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ruskino80
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 03:43 PM |
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try this one
A man travelling by plane was in urgent need of a restroom facility. But each time he tried, it was occupied. The flight attendant, aware of his
predicament, suggested he use the attendant's ladies room, but cautioned him not to press any of the buttons.
There next to the paper roll were four buttons marked WW, WA, PP and ATR.
Making the mistake so many men make of not listening to a woman, he disregarded what she said when his curiosity got the best of him.
He carefully pressed the WW button and immediately a gentle flush of Warm Water sprayed on his bare bottom. He thought "Wow" these gals
really have it nice!!
So a little more boldly he pressed the WA button and body temperature Warm Air blew across his wet bottom and dried it comfortably.
"Aha" he thought, "no wonder these women take so long in the bathroom with these kinds of services!"
So he pushed the next button PP with anticipation. A soft disposable Powder Puff swung below him and dusted his bottom lightly with talc.
"Man, this is great," he thought as he reached out for the ATR button.
When he awoke in the hospital, the morphine was just wearing off...confused he buzzed the nurse to find out what happened.
He explained the last thing he remembered was intense pain in the ladies room on the plane.
The nurse explained, "Yes, you must have been having a great time until you pushed the Automatic Tampon Removal button."
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JUD
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 03:49 PM |
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The plane has just taken off from the UK...
Thanks for the jokes, except for Confused & Excited - that was cruel.
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MK Indy Blade
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iank
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 03:54 PM |
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That's more information than you usually get, though I think you'll be lucky if it leaves in 1.5 hours time.
Good luck, eurostar next time?
p.s. if it's any consolation Orly is worse.
--
Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.
Anonymous
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MikeR
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 04:06 PM |
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now look up the eu legislation on late planes and try and get them to stick to it. I provided 5 hours entertainment in a Swiss airport to my friends.
Ended up with the head of the airport coming down to the departure gate to personally meet me, shake my hand and apolgise!
didn't get me anywhere in the end (apart from some satisfaction that we brits do occasionally know how and when to complain)
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Confused but excited.
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 04:17 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by JUD
The plane has just taken off from the UK...
Thanks for the jokes, except for Confused & Excited - that was cruel.
Sorry mate.
Please accept my most profound apologies for any distress caused.
Genetically predisposed towards an evil sense of humour. 
Tell them about the bent treacle edges!
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JUD
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 04:22 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by Confused but excited.
quote:
Originally posted by JUD
The plane has just taken off from the UK...
Thanks for the jokes, except for Confused & Excited - that was cruel.
Sorry mate.
Please accept my most profound apologies for any distress caused.
Genetically predisposed towards an evil sense of humour.
No worries.I'll get over it.
Information telly thing says we start boarding 5 minutes ago. A quick look out the window confirms that the airbridge is connected to... air.
Not looking good.
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MK Indy Blade
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John Bonnett
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 05:45 PM |
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I've had one experience with CDG and it has marked me for life. Never ever ever again!!
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JUD
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 05:54 PM |
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Well as the little dude on Paradise Island says: "Da plane boss, da plane".
Finally got on it after they turned it round... Only to be told there was no takeoff slot for at least 45 minutes.
There is no god.
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MK Indy Blade
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David Jenkins
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 05:56 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by JUD
There is no god.
I'd keep that thought quiet until you've landed - you'll be a bit closer to Him on the way home...
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coozer
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 07:27 PM |
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Thank your lucky stars the place didn't fall down!
1972 V8 Jago
1980 Z750
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JUD
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 09:24 PM |
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Well, the saga finally ends.
Arrived home at 22:00 UK time. Original take off time was 16:15 UK time. Flight duration 45 mins...
What an ar$e journey.
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MK Indy Blade
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nitram38
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 09:44 PM |
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If it makes you feel better....
My family were left stranded for 24 hrs in Orlando by Travelcitydirect in 2005.
I took them to court under the new EU rules and won £3000 back.
It took me 18 months 3 court visits and untold numbers of letters.
I cannot stress how bad this company are when they have delays.
My court case rested on "extraordinary circumstances" which is basically a get out for an airline.
I won't go into details but a fault had developed some 30 days earlier and had not been fixed during a maintenance period.
The judge deemed that they had plenty time to provide a replacement aircraft.
Their maintenance is very poor.
How do I know?
This May they had another 26 hour delay because an engine fell off the same 747 on take off from Sanford airport in orlando.
They had done engine pylon repairs during the very same maintenance in 2005!!!!!!
[Edited on 6/7/2007 by nitram38]
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RK
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| posted on 6/7/07 at 10:34 PM |
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Better all stay home then. Sounds like it's too much trouble having to work for a living.
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