shindha
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posted on 8/7/11 at 01:51 PM |
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Chuck Norris
chuck norris sleeps under the boogey mans bed.
superman wears chuck norris pyjamas
death once had a chuck norris experience
he killled a man with a cordless phone!!!he can slam a revolving door
he caught a cold once.....and killed it
he can win a game of connect 4 with 3 moves
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives
he cuts scissors with paper
the entire movie of ''anaconda'' was filmed in chuck norris's pants
when batman needs help he puts out his chuck norris signal
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
he doesnt brush his teeth.. he dares them to get dirty
Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the poo out of it
if chuck norris was a spartan the movie would be called "1"
wallys hiding.....cos chuck norris is lookin!!!!
he can make ice cubes in a microwave
he once got bit by a rattle snake........ After three days of pain and agony ..................the rattle snake died
chuck norris did it his way and frank sinatra sang about it
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Davegtst
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posted on 8/7/11 at 02:40 PM |
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My favorites
When Chuck Norris does press ups he doesn't push himself up, he pushes the world down.
Ghosts sit around campfires and tell Chuck Norris stories.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago but death hasn't got the courage to tell him.
[Edited on 8/7/11 by Davegtst]
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redeye
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posted on 8/7/11 at 02:48 PM |
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Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin that he built with his bare hands
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Irony
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posted on 8/7/11 at 03:13 PM |
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Behind Chuck Norris's beard there is just another fist.
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scootz
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posted on 8/7/11 at 03:29 PM |
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Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet... he scares the sh*t out of it!
It's Evolution Baby!
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Liam
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posted on 8/7/11 at 03:30 PM |
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There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris'd.
And the other 50 billion Chuck Norris jokes...
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Doctor Derek Doctors
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posted on 8/7/11 at 03:56 PM |
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And apparently Chuck Norris doesn't even obey the laws of time and space..... facts about him are still funny after 10 years
Also an LCB relevant one.
Chuck Norris once managed to lift a Pinto Engine Block!
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NOTE:This user is registered as a LocostBuilders trader and may offer commercial services to other users
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MikeRJ
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posted on 8/7/11 at 04:24 PM |
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quote: Originally posted by Doctor Derek Doctors
Chuck Norris once managed to lift a Pinto Engine Block!
Lets keep these "facts" plausible please
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JC
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posted on 8/7/11 at 04:35 PM |
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Chuck Norris is made of the second hardest substance in the world. The first only exists when he is excited........
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Ninehigh
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posted on 8/7/11 at 04:35 PM |
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quote: Originally posted by MikeRJ
quote: Originally posted by Doctor Derek Doctors
Chuck Norris once managed to lift a Pinto Engine Block!
Lets keep these "facts" plausible please
Win
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omega 24 v6
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posted on 8/7/11 at 05:06 PM |
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I heard Chuck Norris can put a Rowntrees fruit pastile in his mouth without chewing it. AND he once counted to infinity TWICE
If it looks wrong it probably is wrong.
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Irony
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posted on 8/7/11 at 05:20 PM |
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I heard that Chuck Norris knows the answer to the CEC/BEC debate.
To make a woman orgasm Chuck Norris points at them and says 'Boo Yah'.
[Edited on 8/7/11 by Irony]
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Davey D
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posted on 8/7/11 at 05:28 PM |
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The big bang started when Chuck Norris took mother nature from behind!
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emsfactory
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posted on 8/7/11 at 05:58 PM |
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Chuck Norris answered the unanserable question of what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object.
When he punched hiself in the face.
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loggyboy
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posted on 8/7/11 at 09:36 PM |
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Chuck Norris sounds like the Stig?
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scootz
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posted on 8/7/11 at 09:44 PM |
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Nope.... the Stig can just drive cars. Chuck can do that and EVERYTHING else!
It's Evolution Baby!
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Ninehigh
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posted on 8/7/11 at 09:44 PM |
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quote: Originally posted by loggyboy
Chuck Norris sounds like the Stig?
Chuck Norris is the only American that can drive on a track that turns left AND right
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Front Row Joe
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posted on 8/7/11 at 11:31 PM |
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Try typing 'I found chuck Norris' into Google!
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Davegtst
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posted on 9/7/11 at 08:17 AM |
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^^^ lol ^^^
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franky
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posted on 9/7/11 at 08:39 AM |
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Once caught Aids but decided to let it go
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Guinness
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posted on 9/7/11 at 09:46 AM |
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quote: Originally posted by Front Row Joe
Try typing 'I found chuck Norris' into Google!
LOL!!
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RazMan
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posted on 9/7/11 at 11:04 AM |
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Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried
Cheers,
Raz
When thinking outside the box doesn't work any more, it's time to build a new box
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coozer
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posted on 9/7/11 at 12:04 PM |
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Chuck Norris is dead, he aint the hardest man on the planet....
1972 V8 Jago
1980 Z750
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Confused but excited.
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posted on 9/7/11 at 03:03 PM |
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Chuck Norris was so small, he could fight in a wedding ring.
Tell them about the bent treacle edges!
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