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Human Recycling Machine
JoelP - 7/9/03 at 10:32 PM

Just as a quick rant on a good idea....

I believe that someone should make and pass laws to allow the use of a Human Recycling Machine TM, a wonderful device that would take unworthy human beings and turn them into something useful, ie dog food and leather jackets. Into said device much scum could be thrown, even down to common thieves, but certainly including and not limited to violent thieves, dealers peddling smack and rocks, rapists, war criminals genocidal maniacs and even just those who murder innocents. Even parents who bring up shitty kids, people who listen to loud music at night on Sundays. And in particular people who break car windows outside your house....

This would provide much food for dogs, and leather coats in many colours. As a useful side effect it would also reduce the scum out there and maybe deter other flotsam from pursuing a similar career to the aformentioned.

Maybe a triffle harsh but people must learn that scum cannot be tolerated.

Skin em and put em in kebabs...


Viper - 7/9/03 at 10:45 PM

sounds like soylent green to me


robinbastd - 7/9/03 at 10:47 PM

Welcome to the Conservatives Joel.
Ian Duncan Smith.


stephen_gusterson - 8/9/03 at 09:33 AM

Autoglass windscreens might be the solution to your immediate problems.....




atb

steve


JoelP - 8/9/03 at 12:20 PM

quote:
Originally posted by robinbastd
Welcome to the Conservatives Joel.
Ian Duncan Smith.



umm..... that surely can't be a compliment now, can it?!


James - 8/9/03 at 05:37 PM

quote:
Originally posted by JoelP
and even just those who murder innocents. :


If you wrongly convict (and recycle) an innocent man of murdering innocents do you recycle those who innocently convicted him?

James


ChrisW - 8/9/03 at 07:52 PM

Here here!

Often go down to Shepherd's Bush for lunch and often thought of similar schemes for most of the scum that hang around there. Could do the country a lot of favours with one of those!!

Chris


DaveFJ - 8/9/03 at 09:24 PM

just 'recycle' everyone between the ages of 11 and 17 - gets my vote


Peteff - 8/9/03 at 11:15 PM

just 'recycle' everyone between the ages of 11 and 17 - gets my vote.

Yes and while you're at it anybody under 5' 3" should be shot at birth.

yours, Pete.

Can't trust them short people.


Northy - 9/9/03 at 07:06 AM

And men with beards.

Never trust a man with a beard! You never know what they might be doing behind it. An airfix kit of the Titanic? Having a picnic when your hungry and laughing at you!

And if its ginger.........


jollygreengiant - 9/9/03 at 02:51 PM

quote:
Originally posted by Northy
And men with beards.

Never trust a man with a beard! You never know what they might be doing behind it. An airfix kit of the Titanic? Having a picnic when your hungry and laughing at you!

And if its ginger.........


You never know they might even be logging into locostbuilders.co.uk

The phantom beard grower strikes again

Enjoy


David Jenkins - 9/9/03 at 03:03 PM

quote:
Originally posted by Northy
And men with beards.

Never trust a man with a beard! You never know what they might be doing behind it.


Hell, I don't know what's going on behind my beard!

I shaved a few times when I was around 16 or 17, and rapidly decided that it was a stupid way to start a morning. Never shaved since.

My wife has known me for 32 or 33 years, and she has never seen me unshaven.

David
(Founder member of BBOF Society*)

*Boring Bearded Old Fart - a title I proudly earned on TOL.


Rorty - 10/9/03 at 06:42 AM

Peteff:

quote:

Yes and while you're at it anybody under 5' 3" should be shot at birth.

Well, that takes care of the human race then. Most people I know were under 5"3" when they were born!


Rorty - 10/9/03 at 06:51 AM

This very black kettle forgot to add what I wanted to say in the first place, which is; how can anyone,ever, ever, ever take a man with a comb-over seriously.
They're obviously deceitful, and under the condescending misapprehension they've pulled the wool over everyone's eyes......by er....pulling their own wool over their own eyes....so to speak.


stephen_gusterson - 10/9/03 at 08:21 AM

I think anyone facing bobby charlton while he was attacking their goal took him seriously!

(for the non brits or football types 'soccer' he was a major player for manchester united (ugg) and the 1966 world cup winning team.)


atb

steve

but yeah, I agree with the concept. But then I have no probs with hair qty, just its tendency to loose colour recently...


Peteff - 10/9/03 at 05:25 PM

Most people I know were under 5"3" when they were born!

Only most of them.

yours, Pete.


Rorty - 12/9/03 at 04:57 AM

Well I wasn't.


Mark H - 12/9/03 at 10:06 AM

Have you got a photo of this facial feature? I'm sure i talk for most people here that we would like to see it.


David Jenkins - 12/9/03 at 10:15 AM

I'd hate to make you all feel inferior by showing you my dazzling good looks!


You'll just have to meet me at a show sometime... but not Donnington, unfortunately.

cheers,

David (a.k.a. Mr Mystery)


Mark H - 12/9/03 at 10:37 AM

David - we will definitely feel inferior. You beard must be a fine example by now. We bow down to your chins hirsuteness.

Like ZZ Top.

I will look forward to that day.

Mark


David Jenkins - 12/9/03 at 10:44 AM

Ah - I see the problem!

I may not have shaved since nineteen hundred and frozen-to-death, but I do trim it regularly...
it's a fairly short beard.

Mind you a ZZ Top beard would be a laugh...

DJ


MK Goldrush - 12/9/03 at 12:14 PM

Your beard may be trimmed regularly but you really need to keep an eye on the rest of your body hair, judging by this picture


David Jenkins - 12/9/03 at 12:29 PM

Those paperazzi photographers - you can't get any privacy these days!



David


Peteff - 12/9/03 at 02:29 PM

Hounded to distraction by the pepperami, there's an image, could be another Princess Di scenario.

yours, Pete.


David Jenkins - 14/9/03 at 02:50 PM

quote:
Originally posted by David Jenkins
I may not have shaved since nineteen hundred and frozen-to-death, but I do trim it regularly...
it's a fairly short beard.



For a graphic illustration, see my photo archive ("me and car" )



DJ

[Edited on 14/9/03 by David Jenkins]